Of all the days since my PC went to join the other saints and angels, this has been the hardest for me. No clear reason. Moments of ok, then sobbing uncontrollably into his pillow this evening.
I am OK, no fear, I will survive this, just feel really empty and missing him.
Heard his voice a few times reminding me to take care of the dog, get the mail, etc.
Even made it to quilting group this afternoon. Thankfully, the group was small today and focused on organizing...which, if you know me, does make me happy!..so our room looks nicer.
Came home, and just cried, and cried. Feisty stuck right beside me, I need to do this, and I shall finish my mission in this lifetime.
I meditated, and the words of a verse from a hymn sung many years ago in the church of my youth kept surfacing, so here it is, gender-modified:
When she first began her warfare,
Many said, she will run away!
But they all have been mistaken,
For in the fight she is today!
I love Jesus, he is my saviour,
I love Jesus, yes I do!
I love Jesus, Hallelujah, all who love the Savior come!
Have not heard this in many years, just needed it today I guess.
Attempted to quilt some, but just could not..last things I made were the memory squares for his memorial. Must not be time yet.
Well, my pieces are soggy, yet my peace withstands, need to apply heavier starch in the morn to make it another day!
Macs
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